Dementia isn't Alzheimers

It's a good thing that so much is being written and discussed about Alzheimers disease. My mother didn't have Alzheimers. She had vascular dementia. Apparently it is possible for a skilled geriatrician to determine one from the other through testing like those in the Merck manual linked from my first blog post on the subject.

Vascular dementia is caused by mini-strokes. Apparently these are imperceptible. My mother suffered from vertigo and would sometimes get dizzy and pass out, hitting her head on the ground, or worse. When I was a kid I vividly remember her falling in the kitchen and hitting her head on the handle to the bottom drawer of the stove. It broke and she was lying in a pool of blood. This was before 911 so I ran for a neighbor. I can't remember what happened from that point, but I can still see my mother passed out on the kitchen floor in a pool of blood.

There were other dizzy incidents over the years, and I suspect they all contributed in some way to her vascular dementia. In any case, the outcome from Alzheimers or dementia is the same -- your brain forgets how to keep your systems running and lets them shut down. How long that process takes is what makes each situation different, and all of them difficult for caregivers and family.

Dementia Accelerates at the End

I've written that my mother has already passed from dementia. Cause of death is shown as cardiac arrest, but she didn't have heart trouble. Her brain forgot to tell her heart to pump anymore.

It's amazing how quickly things go at the end of a "demented" life. Here is the actual chronology for my mother.

For the past 9 months she lived in an assisted living facility. On 1/18 I got a call that the facility called a homecare place. After a phone call I learned that mom's doctor recommended to the facility that they contact the homecare company.

1/21 - I met with the representative of the homecare company and learned about hospice, and the fact that mom's doctor had diagnosed "failure to thrive."

1/27 - Mom was moved to the hospice facility by medical carrier. I was told to meet her there. She was a wreck. Deathly afraid and holding on to the bars of her bed with both hands while curled in a fetal position. She had no idea what was going on.

1/29 - I started moving her furniture and belongings from the assisted living place since she would never be going back.

1/30 - I finished moving her things. My daughter came out after a 6 hour drive to spend time with her grandmother and me at the hospice.

1/31 - Time together with mom at hospice. Daughter had to go back home to take care of her daughter.

2/1, 2/2, 2/3 - I stopped at the hospice for a few hours every night after work. I was never comfortable about leaving because I couldn't know if that would be the last time I'd see her alive.

2/4 - 10:30 AM - Doctor at the hospice called me at work. Said mom "looks different today. I think it's only a matter of hours." I immediately went there.

2/5 - As I fitfully tried to sleep in the recliner by my mother's bed, I woke up at 1:45 because her noisy breathing had stopped. As I wrote earlier, the nurse confirmed shortly thereafter that she "was gone." I sat by her bed for the next hour and a quarter talking to my mother's body, assuming her soul was already off to a better place. While still on her bed, I kissed her on the forehead, said goodbye, and went home.

More to follow...